The woman in the mirror

I always review my progress, as a parent, on a quarterly basis and I must say I sucked the past four months. Don’t get me wrong, I am NOT about to belittle myself, it is my assessment of what went wrong!

I am proud of being a single mom of three, pulling a full time teaching position, entrepreneur, parent representative of a school governing body and aunt,those are the relationships and areas that require the most from me and lately there just hasn’t been enough of me to go around. My forty-something year old self just needs an additional 12 hours added to my day in order to be a better version of my fabulous real self!

I love my kids dearly and am fiercely protective of them, but my overtired self has really made it painfully impossible to express that. So how bad has been, you might wonder.

As bad as:

  • Snapping at my already children
  • Bad mouthing their dad for not pitching to pick them up
  • Threatening to have the dogs impounded
  • Screaming and shouting 24/7
  • Slacking on preparing good nutritious meals

The worst is that I really just want to forget about being late for work again and drop happy kids off at school, and drive off to my mornings only job and be there waiting when school dismisses. My desire to be more available for my children is destroying the results of what I am already doing! Now, that is ‘mommy bashing’ par excellence!

How do I convince myself that whatever I am doing right now is my best, without comparing myself to any other mother- single, married, co-parenting, SAHM or all other forms of mothering?

I shall acknowledge that :

  • I am doing the job of two parents
  • I step up to the plate when required
  • I am a woman and mother of substance
  • Without my efforts my children’s world would be poorer 
  • I am doing my best, albeit imperfectly

I long to pledge to myself that I will no longer aspire to be a perfect mother, because she is the figment of my and many others’ imagination. She does not exist and demonizing of self, is not going to improve my performance as much as loving myself and acknowledging my works-as good- can potentially do.

I will from now on, aspire to:

  • Hug instead of snap!
  • Laugh rather than frown!
  • Sing instead of shout!
  • Pray before complaining!
  • Dance in the eye of the storm!

The woman in my mirror deserves love, my support, my compassion, and to be acknowledged by me as a QUEEN!

http://www.bloggymoms.com/?xg_source=msg_mes_network

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Lovemade Brown Bread Roll Recipe

I was compelled to come up with bread rolls, after running out of bread for the umpteenth time!

Truth be told I hastily threw the dry ingredients in a bowl and only remembered that I should’ve added some oil! But here goes…

Ingredients:
4 cups cake flour
2 cups brown bread flour
10g yeast (sachet)
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon salt
1 liter warm water
2 tablespoons oil

Method:
1. Place all dry ingredients in a deep bowl (TUPPERWARE absolute MUST) and whisk with a fork or by hand to mix and incorporate air.

2. Make a well in the centre and pour half of the water and mix lightly, by hand, adding more water as it gets absorbed.

3. Work swiftly but lightly, until all the water has been incorporated and a soft, but not runny dough is formed.

4. Knead for 3-5 minutes and cover with fitted lid.

5. Leave to prove till the lid POPS off!

6. Knead and pour oil onto your hands to incorporated into dough. Leave yo prove.

7. Preheat your oven on 70 degrees Celsius. Prepare a pan and spread with butter/ margarine.

8. The lid should’ve popped a second time! Make equal sized balls, and place close together on the prepared pan.


9. Place in oven and leave to rise till double in size.

10. Remove, cover and keep in a warm place. Increase oven heat up 170 degrees Celsius.

11. Bake till brown and sounds hollow when tapped, baking time 20-25 minutes. Yields about 15 buns.

12. Delicious and filling!



One tough mommy

I still have to meet a mom who knew exactly what their role as the primary caregiver of another human being would require. The role of mom is often romanticized and depicted as a cool stroll in the park. In short, we all suffer from shell shock when you realise your offspring is not textbook material, but an individual. Does that make you a bad mom? Of course, not!
However,you soon realise you have the responsibility of grooming your baby into the best person they can possibly become. I have been a mom for all of 12 years and still make the most unexpected mistakes with my kids.
But for my kids have done the following:
* Walked out on a job because of an anti-kid work environment
* Prayed for a teaching position in a 10km radius, which includes
   the daycare facility- and got it!
* Quit my job to be a single SAHM
* Home schooled two of my children
* Returned to a full time job to provide for their needs
* Sacrificed more than I care to count


Image courtesy of africa via FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Looking back I can’t believe that I had built up such an extensive resume as a mother. How it happened is an even greater mystery! What I do recall are all the moms I met on my journey. My mother,sisters, friends, church ladies and even fellow shoppers. They knew exactly what to say and when to say it. They could see the result of the sleepless night you had, they recognised how close you were to bursting out in tears. But, they never judged you- they gave well-measured advise; held your baby so you could finish your cup of tea; offered a treat to a busy toddler- but they never judged!
That type of understanding can only come from a mother whether your baby was breastfed or bottle fed, whether you returned to work one month after the birth or never worked. The challenges of raising amazing little people, are known to moms only regardless of what we do to take of their needs. Some positions in life are so sacred that you may only raise an opinion, once you have been through the storm.
I have  been under the knife multiple times to release my babies, major surgery can be recovered from but being a mom, is a lifetime opportunity. We may not always feel confident, in our doing but you gotta faith it till you make it.
Committed to my #mommitment!

Unapologetic Mom

Love is a powerful emotion, it is such that you will do things beyond your own expectations. This I learn daily whilst raising my three children. 
When your child is born; bonding and showering them with love , is the most fulfilling and indescribable act through which love is shown by a mother. It is the most amazing and rewarding stage of mothering. As our young ones grow, so does the demands of motherhood and the more offspring you have, the greater the demand. Having more than one child does not mean you are neglecting any of your children, you merely get to share your fabulosity with more people!
The past year I had to shift my parenting gears big time! My eldest is a pre-teen, at 12. My middle child, a 9 year old boy; and the youngest at 6 is learning to become independent. My mothering skills are being tested to the brim and so is my ability to stand up for my kids. One thing I realise daily, whilst interacting with moms of all spheres, is that there is nothing unique about my challenges- it might be something new to me; but not unheard of! The best I can do, is to share how I deal with them.
Whether you are a SAHM, working mom, single mom or whichever category you want to place yourself under; you are capable of doing much for and with your children. Forget about what everyone else is doing, trust that you are doing your best. If you believe you can do better, than do so. Set your own standard whilst learning from what everyone else are doing.
Love for my kids made me choose to do a few things, that made life more manageable and enjoyable.
Try this:
* Teach them the power of prayer
* Help them understand that they are responsible for one another and themselves
* Give chores
* Let them prepare meals
* Explain the value of money
* Participate in their school organisations (they spend most of their day in school, so you might as well be aware of what happens in school)
* Allow them to have pets
One thing my children know without any doubt, is that I will confront any person who dares to infringe on their right to being. That is a total non-negotiable area and which I refuse to ever be apologetic about! We have an African saying, ‘ You strike a woman, you strike a rock!’ You better believe it! 
As a mother you do not have to apologise for expecting your children’s humanity and rights to be recognised, bearing in mind that they in turn, should not disregard those of another. Basic rights include the much debated issue of education, each person have a different opinion as to what constitutes a good education. 
Education is still an unattainable right for many across the globe, and where it is available the standard remains questionable; but that does not mean you have to accept it. No institution is above the law and in free countries, it becomes your obligation to query the status quo and if possible set wheels in motion for change or create cognisance about important matters.
Common problems experienced in schools: – Bullying
– Special Needs Education
– Gifted learners
– Attitudes , Skills and Values of educators
– Facilities
– School discipline
Where do you stand as a mother? 
  • Do you protect your child by hovering on the perimeter or do you muster all your courage and join parent bodies that orchestrate change?
  •  Do you leave change to politicians and civic leaders? 

No, mothers get up and start involving themselves in what affects their most precious and fragile gift. We cannot allow the box officers (people who box us by their standards) to keep us from making a difference.

Mothers need to stand up, regardless of how frightened, inadequate or ill-equipped you might feel. That could be the best way you show your children that you love them, by standing up for more children than only your own.

The roar of a mum is as bad as her bite!
We can do significant things, in small ways.

Trust in God means letting go!

An 8 step plan to greater trust in God


Single parenting and being a stay at home mum taught me the following lessons. I gave up my full-time teaching job to start a home run business, but things didn’t quite work out according to my plans. I ended up homeschooling two of my children. This essentially meant less time available for my home baking business. I was literally dependent on God’s provision – all my crutches were removed and replaced by faith.

 
Lesson 1: His ways are not mine, I only see the cover he wrote the book.

Lesson 2: Trust him with something small,he is sure to make you stagger with the magnitude of his blessing.

Lesson 3: The desires of your heart are limited to what you can see – the big mansion, expensive cars, private schools,and worldly comforts. God’s desires for you exceed the ordinary it’s closest to humanly impossible.

Lesson 4: That which you declare will manifest.

Lesson 5: That thought which was actually a prayer,will be answered. Sooner rather than later.

Lesson 6: Do not measure your success by your salary, live like a bird and dress like a lily- God is your chef and designer.

Lesson 7: A roller coaster ride can’t beat the God trusting edge it’s more exciting and the effect is everlasting.

Lesson 8: Praise be to God always for every pleasure or trial.

I would love to hear, of the times you had no other option but to trust that God will do what his Word promises?

Mom’s homebake business opportunity

Business opportunity for Stay-at-home-mums.

I started out my SAHM journey by quitting my fulltime teaching job and starting a home-based baking business. It soon culminated in me homeschooling two of my children. Homeschooling pushed me into playing day mum for a neighbours two young ones and a friends, little girl. Looking back I don’t know how I did it, but by grace!

I bought a franchise The Wacky Cake Heaven (www.thewackycakeheaven.com) and embarked on my solo journey with very little knowledge of running a business.

The support I received from the franchisor, Tracey Williams, was amazing. She was always available to help and encourage, despite being based in the UK. Her encouraging words and regular checkups; kept me going even at moments of utter despair.

A number of opportunities exist in Johannesburg South region. SAHM you can earn whilst spending valuable time with your little ones.

The web address http://www.thewackycakeheaven.com. Looking forward to welcoming you into the Wacky Family.

http://thewackycakeheaven.com/