Get ready to eat it or process it into something more palatable.
I really wish I was the type which oozed positivity, but I am not. When things go wrong, I fall into a cycle of immobility whilst secretly holding on to wishful thinking, hoping that things will magically work out in the end.
Grappling with harsh realities often opens up a vulnerability whose existence one finds very difficult to acknowledge or even confront. How do you move from being strong and fearless to cowering like a frightened animal trapped in a corner? I was sinking whilst swimming but it forced me to the depth, I knew I was able to handle. So how does one work your way through an unexpected bowl of lemons? You eat it segment by segment until you are done!
I have seen more changes in twelve months than most have seen in twelve new moons. I had to re-evaluate a number of things:
- my purpose as person and professional.
- my definition of self.
- how did I think others view me on a personal and professional level?
- where I saw myself in the near future (I was unemployed at the time)?
- whether I would sacrifice my principles for a job?
- what my next was going to be?
I still experience the anxiety and insecurity of being unemployed and having to find creative ways of keeping up the appearance of everything being alright. I have realised that I am still paddling, but this time the paddle is different. I am more confident and determined.
The fact is, it is still a lemon but I have decided to colour code it and connect the taste of the lemon to my level of tenacity.
The blue represents my struggle with self-worth as person and professional.
The black represents the realisation that I was unemployed and might be for a protracted period and; the fact that having a professional qualification was no guarantee of employment
The orange signifies the disappearance of my tunnel vision. I had to acknowledge that my life had changed in a way, I had not anticipated.
The yellow is the realisation that I was going to have to get used to the stinging taste of change.
The green meant that growth was inevitable, though it was a painful process – it proved necessary!
I now have a greater appreciation for lemons, other than just its culinary properties. It is necessary when we need to change the taste on your palate from fear to courage; sinking to swimming and from stinging to sweet. May the lemons which life dishes up for you bring you abundant wisdom and courage to taste and appreciate, every segment.